my whole life i was gaslit regarding my ADHD, they said i wasn’t doing things because i couldn’t remember to do them. that i was failing at executive function, when in reality i cannot percieve the passage of time, and am extremely willful in my decisions of what i want to do.
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the more i read about executive dysfunction, the more my brain screams “this is not you, this has never been you” and now it’s a problem because all the suggestions i get center around this. i totally understand the NT “exert willpower to do a thing” reason, i just don’t get why.
this is hard to articulate as i don’t have the ability to choose what is or isn’t appealing to me, and that is what drives my decision making. i think NTs would call that having choice but to me that is only self sabotage. i’ve never come across anyone else like this so idk